Happy New Year 2011
To start with; i like the number 2 0 1 1 it’s an odd number and i usually feel comfortable around odd numbers.
Truth told 2010 was one of my favorite most special years since (2003-2005).
if i would describe 2010 id say that it’s a beautifully neutral year, at the start of 2010 the most beautiful unexpected took place, while i was planning to fall apart from something destiny had other plans, it was planning on pushing me even closer, it was planning for a collision.
When we collide we come together
If we don’t we’ll always be apart
I’ll take a bruise, I know you’re worth it
When you hit me, hit me hard
I did take some bruises this year from different people starting myself and my god did i give bruises!
I gave many cuts and bruises.
In 2010 i learned that when u r broken whether in heart and spirit, you will definitely cut and bruise the ones who come in touch with you but that never means that you should block them out and thats that, but at least let them know whats going on. dont accept a helping hand offered by someone in need for the same one too, someone with the same weakness.
Accept the help from someone with a weakness u are strong at and a stregnth you are weak at. you will definitely form a stronger link.
At the end of the day we all have our weaknesses but the mistake we make is that we tend to seek out people who share our same weakness when were supposed to do the opposite!
A warm cosy home with broken glass all over the floor. sweep the glass away then invite people in.
Sometimes you might need a hand to sweep the glass away, this is when the hard decision comes, inviting someone in… they come in they get hurt and you feel like you shouldnt have let them in in the first place… the hurt run away for cure and your left alone after building up hope that you could get rid of the mess faster after having someone to help you.
Back to square one, alone again. time a wicked wise phantom, the more time passes by the more you adapt to the broken glass… no one knocks ur door so why clean up the mess!
After quite a long while the phantom “time” appears as a reflection of you on the glass window, it caught you in a moment where you are staring through the window watching people living lovingly, you wanting to invite them in but too scared, they might run out on you.
It looks at you and whispers…
“Isn’t this such a waste? you have a beautiful warm cosy home with no one to share it with, because of your fear of asking for help, your fear of letting someone in and revealing your mess and scars, because of your underestimation of your ability to clean this mess up on your own!
Don’t you realise that you could’ve been done with it by now!
Dont you think u should at least earn the help you need…”
You pick up the broom and start sweeping and sweeping till your back starts aching and ur hands starts shaking.
You put the broom aside head to the window again and opened the curtains wide open, the sun beams in every corner of that beautiful home, lighting it up.
While your standing by your window, you see people gathering around in amazement, you wonder what spell has been cast on their senses… you gaze back and notice beautiful twinkling in the eyes of the crowd, you look back at your home to find that the sun light has shown on whats left of your broken glass to form a galaxy of its own full of shining stars, shining rays of reflection all over.
You smile with a tear at the sight, youve never imagined that your broken pieces could appear so magical when exposed…
People start approaching you wanting to know the secret behind that beautiful scene.
They want to come in. they insist on offering a hand after they’ve seen how far youve come with all the broken pieces youve swept before on your own, they start offering more than just a sweeping hand but flowers in new crystal vases plants, paintings to emphasise the beauty of your home and even food … and in no time your home is back!
a warm cosy beautiful home with no broken glass, a happy peaceful inviting home like never before…
“Time” the phantom appears again and whispers…
“With will in hand, hope and faith in heart a “Life” shall always blossom.”
In 2010 i learned that yes you might not be in ur full mind when in love that never means u should seek assistance from outside even if your clueless. (if your close to your mom or have a sister then lucky you!)
i learned that given that your not in your full mind when in love you should take extra care of yourself and stick to all your standards with endless stubbornness…chances are you will end up with less regrets and a higher sense of self worth.
True love is surrendering and letting things be what they want to be appealing it is or not.
Love is being happy.
Love is suffer-less.
Love could be one sided or unequal in size, form or shape.
Love cannot be forced nor manoeuvred.
Possession is not love but part of love is the need to posess ur loved one.
2010 my neutrally beautiful year half of it a love gained and the other half a love lost… thankfully with love.
By the end of the year 2010 i lost a friend, we (my dad and i) bought a new car instead of the old one (u will be missed <3) and we got our first dog “Pongo” (name now changed to “Cooper” because ppl keep saying Bungo instead of Pongo!) a beautiful yellow 45day Labrador Retriever on Wed. 29th of December 2010 :) (now finally named Sultan :D)
It’s tough having a puppy dog, its like having a baby u cant sleep u cant eat u cant go out for long and you need to be fully attentive all the time!
Not to mention the potty training and his constant need to bite on something!!!
He’s still adorable though :)
In 2011 if i were to wish for something i would wish for academic success, self fulfilment, peace of mind for ma and health and comfort for pa and last but not least i wish for you and no one else but you.